5 Powerful ways to bulletproof commitments
How To Quit Quitting
Commitments. The magical promises that a specific event will happen, no matter what. Isn’t it inspiring to see people rising from misery and pain up to grace and purpose, turning their lives around 180 degrees? Isn’t it remarkable to see normal people like you and me suddenly lose a lot of weight, pursuing their dream job or arriving at a point in their life where they say “yes, this is it. This is the life I was talking about all the time.”
This is the power of commitments!
5 Powerful ways to bulletproof commitments:
What is a commitment?
A commitment is a powerful covenant with oneself, an unwavering pledge to fulfill one’s desires. Sometimes it requires surrendering one’s ego and personal will to walking in faith and trust, and being guided by a steadfast inner voice that whispers the truth of one’s being. Through commitment, one becomes a vessel of grace, embodying the qualities of compassion, wisdom, and courage.
#1 CREATE YOUR COMMITMENT AND PUT IT ON PAPER
A progress-oriented commitment consists of two parts:
→ The concrete goal setting
→ Creating your why behind the commitment
Setting the goal - let's aim for something worthwhile!
Since practice makes the master, grab your notebook or a piece of paper, a pen and let`s rock! Don’t worry, we`ll just practice for now.
What is the one thing that you have to think about all the time, but didn’t execute yet? Clarify it. Whether it be decreasing weight, learning a new language or earning a specific amount of money. Write it down on your paper now.
We aim for learning Spanish today! Just replace Spanish with your aim.
Setting a goal is like booking a flight to your favorite holiday destination: You decide where you want to go, when you want to go, how many layovers you want to have and how much time it should take. That’s everything you need to know (Yes, you got the permission to fly first class! Enjoy the flight)
What’s the destination?
We aim for a Spanish proficiency of A2. This is enough to confidently articulate and understand basic Spanish sentences for your holidays or even start a new life. We have to be specific here, because if you booked a hotel in Denpasar Bali, but your flight goes to Jakarta, then your aim was too vague. If we would just say learning Spanish, we don’t know where the finish line is. This is a critical step to reach the exact destination you want to end up.
When do you want to start?
That’s why we start today with writing down the goal. Today is the start. Whenever you set a new aim, always do the first step at the same day. Even if it is a micro-step.
How many layovers do you want to have?
Let’s say you aim for two major milestones. A1 and A2. This is essential for tracking your progress and celebrate your accomplishments. It will give you boosts in motivation and confidence! Don’t skip this step.
How much time should it take?
To get the most joy out of your commitment, you have to find the sweet spot between too easy and super difficult. This is also the point where you feel most joy according to science. Set yourself an ambitious goal. Not too hard to reach and not an easy one. Either one of them is bad. Too much pressure ends up in frustration and too little progress also. Reaching a Spanish level of A2 is reachable between four and seven month (150 and 180 learning hours)
Break it down to daily milestones
Learning 45 minutes every day for the next 7 month will catapult you to an A2 Spanish proficiency. This adds up to 170 hours in total and a stuffed vocabulary treasure of around 1500 words. Amazing!
Now let’s chant the spell:
I festively commit to improve my Spanish proficiency to A2 by September 2023. My plan to reach this goal is to learn 45 minutes Spanish every day. I will track my progress weekly on [day of your choice} to ensure success.
Did you know?
Congratulations! You now belong to the 1% who writes down goals at all. According to a study at the Dominican University of California you already have increased the chance of succeeding by 42%, just by manifesting your aim on paper. It’s recommendable to set a fixed time of the day to work towards your goal. Otherwise, life will plan the day for you.
Tipp:
Allow yourself variety. As in this post mentioned, our brain rewards us with more joy if we provide novelty to our practice. How can this look like? If you use your favorite app to practice, consider meeting with a friend once in a while to practice speaking. If there is no friend available, every city has language exchange groups where you can learn new words and practice your skills. Watch movies with Spanish subtitles, listen to Spanish music and read the lyrics, read essays, poems, change the places where you learn Spanish – make your exercise colorful. Whatever it is you’re trying to achieve, create a colorful journey. Believe me, that your brain will reward you with happiness and progress.
Creating you why
Having a goal is great, but it’s still an empty bullet. Why is that? Because everybody can say, I want to do xxx until xxx. Still, the majority out there doesn’t achieve their goals because there is one fundamental key component missing. It’s the holy grail of commitments. It’s the spirit of your body and your life. It’s the fire that you carry within your heart, the reason why you do all of that. Finding or creating a why is like your airplane never has to land to get fuel from an external source. With a big enough why, you will never run out of fuel. Nobody has to motivate you anymore. With a commitment it’s never a matter of motivation. It’s a matter of inspiration. What inspires you to do all of that?
Tony Robbins described it in his first seminars as “finding and emotional trigger strong enough, that it flows from your conscious mind into your subconscious mind”. Through inspiration, the fire of your motivation is rekindling itself without your need to take care of it. How can this look like? It’s about asking yourself repeatedly:
→ “why is this important to me?”
→ “what impact will it have on others?”
→ “what happens if I don’t make this commitment?”
Before you build a house, there has to be a strong fundament. Otherwise, it will not last. You build the fundament of your commitment by manifesting your “why”. Manifesting doesn’t happen in one day. It takes time and repeated confirmation from you. When you to the supermarket, when you drive to work, before you fall asleep, when you feel pain in life, when you hike a mountain, or when you have a walk in the evening. These are the moments where you can tell yourself: “I want to live healthier so badly, because my whole existence depends on it. My children, my career, my passion – everything!
Connecting your goal with your why builds up a powerful force which you may not be aware yet. Write it down on your paper and let it affect you.
I festively commit to improve my Spanish proficiency to A2 by September 2023. My plan to reach this goal is to learn 45 minutes Spanish every day. I will track my progress weekly on Thursday evening to ensure success. All of this effort is rooted in my strong desire to start a new life in Spain, the place where my heart belongs to. I fell in love with the culture, the people and nature, which has offered me the peace I craved for all my life. If I don’t act according to my commitment I have to keep writing in a book where no empty pages are available anymore. Therefore, I will create destiny by myself and accomplish my goal until September 2023.
Now it’s your turn. If you have not written down your goal yet, do it now. Afterwards start the process to create your why and melt it with your goal. Both combined result in a powerful commitment.
Tipp
Hang your commitment in at least two places with high exposure. What works well are the front of your fridge and next to your bed.
#2 Creating accountability
Researchers found, that you can increase your odds of success even more if you have somebody in life, that holds you accountable for your commitment. Accountability partners work well, because if we tell nobody about our ambitious plans, we can easily quit, and nobody takes notice. How does it work? Ask a person you trust and which is willing to support you. Maybe you even have the same goal! If this person also wants to accomplish a specific goal, you can hold each other accountable. Let them know about your commitment and that you need them to report your weekly progress.
Dare to increase the odds even more?
Agree on a covenant with your partner. For each weekly mini goal you don’t reach, you have to do or give something. This can be 50 bucks to a charity Association or just inviting your accountability partner for a nice dinner. The more painful the deal, the unlikely you will miss your weekly milestone 😉
Text or talk to your new accountability partner now, even if you didn’t finish your commitment yet!
#3 Surround yourself with the right people
Why is it, that we look for sports clubs, when we want to start a sport? Many sports we can do alone, whether it be golf, jogging, or cycling. You got it! Too many reasons!
Some just enjoy the after beer, others value the weekly routine. Not only is the feeling of belonging to a group a nice thing, but it will also boost your overall success.
Mastermind effect
Surrounding yourself with the people who have what you want to have gives you the opportunity to learn from them and ask questions. You will make progress way quicker than alone.
Accountability effect
Even here you generate the feeling of responsibility by showing up for your peers.
You are your environment.
You become the people with whom you surround yourself! Many American soldiers became heroin addicts during the Vietnam war. When they were sent back to the US, a majority of them was cured basically over night without a relapse. On the other side when addicts migrate back to their old environment after a rehab, it’s very likely that they have a relapse. Don’t underestimate the powerful influence of the people around you.
#4 Celebrate your successes and reward yourself
If you have ever learned a language with Duolingo, or played any video game, you will have noticed how sophisticated the reward systems are, that make us feel good. Everything is colorful with checkmarks, progress bars, cheerings that we were successful, visualized ranks and so on. Mix all of that together and we dwell on a cozy cloud of dopamine after every milestone.
Create rewards for your wins and celebrate your successes. There is no need to celebrate every weekend (am I wrong? 😉 ) but you see how good it feels to be rewarded for what we have accomplished. Allow yourself to feel great about what you did. There is enough criticism in our society already. Take a different path and create a reward system for you, which fosters your success and inspiration.
#5 Stay organized
Yes, life demands a lot from us and everybody has responsibilities and expectations to meet. The more cognitive load we carry around with us, the easier it becomes to skip or forget about our commitments. Organization gives us the freedom, that we don’t have to keep events in the back of our head, because the calendar and reminders do that for us.
This creates more freedom and time for the things we actually need to take care of. A daily reminder set on our phone, little checkmarks we place in our calendar or an alarm for a specific time. Organization is a key component to stay true to your commitment and all other important events in your life.
Summary
Create your commitment
Bring your goal and your why on paper. Hang it at least on two places with high exposure
The formula for goal setting
I commit to [specific result] by [until when you want to achieve it]. To reach this goal I will [Specific, daily action]. I will track my goal weekly on [day of your choice] to ensure my success. [Insert your why and what will happen if you break the commitment]
Create accountability
Choose your accountability partner to whom you report your weekly progress.
Surround yourself with the right people
Watch out for the people who have what you want to have or do what you want to do. Learn from them, grow with them.
Celebrate your successes
Create a reward system for yourself and celebrate your accomplishments!
Stay organized
There is no space for clutter with your responsibilities. Use technology and calendars to always keep track and ensure execution.
Bonus:
Today is your lucky day! Here is an example how the greatest mental coach of all time wrote down his commitment. Tony Robbins manifested with the age of 23 precisely the life he desired to live on the back of an old Russian map. The rest is history.
Eight years ago, in 1983, I did an exercise that created a future so compelling that my whole life changed as a result. As pan of the overall process of raising my standards, I established a whole new set of goals, writing down all the things I would no longer settle for, as well as what I was committed to having in my life.
I set aside all my limiting beliefs and sat down on the beach with my journal. I wrote continuously for three hours, brainstorming every possibility of what I could ever imagine doing, being, having, creating, experiencing, or contributing. The timeline I gave myself for achieving these goals was any time from tomorrow to the next twenty years. I never stopped to think about whether I could actually achieve these goals or not. I simply captured any possibility that inspired me and wrote it down.
With nothing to write on but the back of an old Russian map, I wrote down all my long-term goals for my spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and financial destinies, and then created a series of milestones for each one, working backward. For example, in order to achieve my top spiritual goal ten years from now, what kind of person would I have to be, and what things would I need to accomplish by nine years from now, eight years, seven years, and so on, reaching all the way back until today? What specific action could I take today that would lead me on that road to the destiny of my choice?
On that day, I set specific goals that transformed my life. I described the woman of my dreams, detailing what she would be like mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually. I described what my kids would be like, the huge income that I would enjoy, and the home that I would live in, including the third-story circular office area that would overlook the ocean.
Sie haben mit Ihren Worten in diesem Blog wieder vieles auf den Punkt gebracht und auch mich wieder völlig geflasht . Wie Sie so schön sagten : es sollte jeder seine Ziele konkret vor Augen haben und den Mut zu umsetzen finden. ich habe auch gerade vor meine Sprachkenntnisse zu erweitern und bin durch Sie nun noch motivierter weiter zu machen. Danke
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